The Playbook Guide 05
Playbook Guide 05 · The week of, and the day itself
Championship
Wedding week: hand off what you can, keep what matters close, and be fully present.
Julian Harrell 4 min read 
The Principle
Presence in every moment. Everything you’ve prepared for comes together this week. Your job now is not to manage the day, but to be in it: trust your people, keep your kit close and take the moments as they come.
The Essentials
- Pack your day-of kit. Fortune favors the prepared.
- Pack the night before: stain pen, collar stays, mints, a spare tie, phone charger.
- Add your vows, rings (if you’re carrying them) and any letters.
- Hand the kit to your best man or point person. Hint: drop an AirTag in it to be safe.
- Hand off rings and payments to someone you trust. Free your hands and your head for the day.
- Choose one point person you trust completely.
- Give them the rings, payments and vendor contacts.
- Tell your vendors who that person is.
- Take ten quiet minutes before the ceremony. Presence starts with a breath.
- Put ten quiet minutes on the schedule before the ceremony.
- Step away from your phone and the crowd.
- Breathe, reread your vows, and take in the day.
Self-Reflections
Questions for honest self-assessment and curiosity to help build confidence as you progress through your groom season.
- Who is holding the rings, the payments and the timeline?
- What do I need in my pocket, and what can someone else carry?
- When will I take ten quiet minutes for myself?
- What do I want to remember most about today?
Potential Missteps
- Holding onto every detail yourself on the day.
- Forgetting to eat.
- Spending the morning on your phone. Go meditate / touch some grass.
Julian's Journey
Sharing tidbits from my own experience that may help discern your own confidence level:
What do you want the morning of your wedding to look like?
Curtains open. A slight opening in the window lets the sea salt air into the room as the sun creeps in. Coffee, pastry, and fruit await on a small balcony overlooking the water. My soon-to-be bride kisses me deeply and heads off for hair, makeup, and the gown. Right before she leaves the room, I slip her a small white package with a beautiful gold bow. She reads it on the way to meeting her mom, sister, and cadre of beauty experts.
I go for a walk along the coast and find a place to close my eyes and silently repeat my ultimate success mantra. I’m now ready to head back and start my preparation for the ceremony.
Who are you trusting with the details, and how did you choose them?
We hired a wedding planner to cover the vast majority of the details. But we also created a Google Doc where Alex, me, and her mom have worked through various details. For many of the action items, I am handling the responsibility. Again, these are guides, not laws. At the end of the day, trust the system that makes the most sense for you.
Where do you hope to take your quiet moment?
On the beach.
The one moment you’re most looking forward to.
Holding hands with my bride overlooking the coast in Reggio Calabria.
Checklist
Tick items off as you go. Your progress stays on this device.
Make it yours
From the ask to the aisle.
The Curator is Grūm SZN’s premium offering: it helps you focus your priorities relative to how much time you have and moves with you along your journey. One-on-one sessions with Julian can be added à la carte (volume discounts available) for a bespoke service experience.
Grūm SZN shares personal experience and general ideas only. Nothing here is legal, financial, insurance or mental-health advice. For decisions like budgets, contracts or insuring a ring, talk with a qualified professional.